A641.9.3.RB - Becoming a Resonant Leader

Shane, 

    You have learned a lot over the last 9 weeks. More importantly, you have learned a lot about yourself. There are certain things about your real self you wish to move towards becoming your ideal self. These areas include learning how to get back to the physical health, completing your degree, and creating a work-life balance through mindfulness. Below is a detailed plan on how to accomplish all learning goals through action steps and milestones.

Learning Goal 1: Improve Physical Fitness and Overall Health 

Milestone 1: Workout 3 days a week for 3 months 

    Action Steps:

1. Partner with Bryan to ensure accountability 
2. Go to sleep at a reasonable time every night to get up early and workout. Lack of sleep and moving cannot be an excuse.
3. Get enrolled in fitness class at next base / find new workout friends 
   

Milestone 2: Run a 5K 

    Action Steps:

1. Slowly incorporate cardio into the exercise routine.
2. Gradually incorporate frequency of training each week until running 3 times a week.
3. Gradually increase the distance each week.
4. Sign up for 5K that begins 3 months from training start date to allow myself ample training time to prepare and hold myself accountable.

Milestone 3: Meal plan

    Action Steps:

1. Prepare meal plan and menu every Sunday.
2. Grocery shop every Sunday and follow through on purchasing menu items.
3. Review weekly family activity schedule to prepare for dinner conflicts accordingly.

Learning Goal 2: Complete Master’s Degree & graduate by July 31, 2021

Milestone 1: Complete MSLD 641

    Action Steps:

1. 
   Complete Discussion board post & 2 replies
2. Complete General assignment  
3. Complete/post this blog
4. Finish strong  

Milestone 2: Complete MSLD 690

    Action Steps:

1. Plan future schedules around coursework.
2. Work with advisor to ensure eligibility
3. Enroll for the course
4. Complete course

Milestone 3: Graduate

    Action steps:

1. Apply for graduation
2. Plan date/time
3. Invite friends and family to ceremony

Learning Goal 3: Create a healthy work-life balance full of mindfulness

Milestone 1: Improve mindfulness and self-awareness.
    Action Steps:

1. Continue reading/researching mindfulness
2. Find a church in new town that I connect with
3. Attend 4 weekend masses in a row.

Milestone 2: Limit technology
    Action Steps:

1. Do a tech-free day or weekend before the end of January.  
2. Only listen to mindfulness podcasts to/from work
3. Set limits on my phone like I do for the kids
4. Discuss with Bryan and family about joining

Milestone 3: Daily meditation

Action Steps:

1. Research different types of meditation
2. Dedicate 10 minutes a day after waking up to meditation
3. Discuss meditation with friends and family who have prior experience.

Seeing your personal vision become a reality will not be an easy journey. There will inevitably be some obstacles along the way. You will need people in your life to help support you and achieve your learning goals. There may even be some setbacks to accomplishing these goals, but you must see them as temporary and continue Look to your husband, kids, family, friends, and coworkers to be your greatest sources of support.

While this is a considerable amount to think about right now, remember to stay focused but flexible to new opportunities. This letter is a roadmap to what you feel is your current vision. However, we know that life is anything but predictable – and why we are directionally oriented in planning. We know that life is full of detours and that everything can change everything in a second.

A641.8.3.RB - Personal Balance Sheet

Promoting assets and limiting liabilities can help you to achieve your hopes and dreams.  Completing the Personal Balance Sheet (McKee,et al, 2008, p. 150) as well as the exercises throughout the course have helped me reflect on my strengths and weaknesses. I discovered that I find strength in positivity and am passionate, driven, and authentic. Some other strengths are that I am flexible and creative.  Some potential strengths are my focus and initiative.  The Enduring Dispositions that support me is that I have a strong work ethic, I listen thoughtfully, and my ability to adapt and get along with almost anyone.  

I feel that my potential strength is empowering others. Inspiring and empowering others is a critical aspect of being an effective leader. Watching employees learn, grow, and reach their maximum potential is one of the most rewarding parts of being a leader. Northouse (2016) defined empowering as, allowing followers the freedom to be independent, make decisions on their own, and be self-sufficient. As a leader, taking the opportunity to mold your employees into successful individuals is extremely satisfying and something that I feel I am very good at, but not something that I am as effective in as I should be.

I wish I knew how to negotiate better. If I can develop the ability to negotiate the points which are essential and compromise on other points it will alleviate the win-lose situation. Therefore, everyone wins some parts, and I will not get so stressed out over the small details. I can encourage other people but seem to doubt myself in taking my own advice. According to Dan Rockwell, there is good doubt that can inspire critical thinking and there is bad doubt that paralyzes us. There is no progress with (bad) doubt. (Rockwell, 2014) Questioning our value could become a good doubt because it forces us to investigate where that feeling comes from. We may even discover new things about ourselves. It is when that questioning leads to inaction or demanding guarantees it can be debilitating and bad. (Rockwell, 2014)

When contemplating what I know I want to improve in, the main thing I want to do better is speaking up to assert myself. At times, I feel like if I am the least experienced person in the room, I don’t have enough credibility or a voice to express an opinion or idea. A weakness I want to change that can help me improve other weaknesses is my lack of self-confidence. Northouse (2016) explains, “Leadership involves influencing others, and self-confidence allows the leader to feel assured that his or her attempts to influence others are appropriate and right” (p. 24). As I develop as a leader, it is critical that my self-confidence improves because if I am continually second guessing myself, I am leaving the door wide open for my team to second guess me.

This personal balance sheet has allowed me to view and discuss my strengths and weaknesses. I understand that there are various strengths that I could display more often, but I feel comfortable with my strengths. My weaknesses, on the other hand, tend to hold me back. I must learn to be view myself in a more positive manner and relinquish the self-doubt if I am going to continue to grow.

Refernces:

McKee, A., Boyatzis, R., & Johnston, F. (2008). Becoming a Resonant Leader: Develop Your Emotional Intelligence, Renew Your Relationships, Sustain Your Effectiveness. Boston: Harvard Business Schools.

Northouse, P.G., (2016). Leadership: Theory and Practice, 7^th Edition. Thousand Oaks, CA: SAGE Publications, Inc.

Rockwell, D. (2014, Apr 26). Seven Certain Steps for Dealing with Doubt. Retrieved from Leadership Freak: https://leadershipfreak.blog/2014/04/26/seven-certain-steps-for-dealing-with-doubt/

A641.7.3.RB - Appreciating Your "Real Self"

Complete the following exercises: "Listening To Your Wake Up Calls" in Chapter 3 of the workbook “Becoming a Resonant Leader.” 

Taking Stock  

Building Mindfulness Through a Personal Inventory

The activities I consider of greatest worth in my life are working hard, teaching my kids, mentoring others, reading, learning, time with family, and time spent outdoors.  The activities I consider of greatest worth in my work are mentoring others, working hard, learning, networking, and building relationships.  

What am I currently doing in my life that I like?

• Make the time challenge
• Taking masters class
• Decluttering and getting rid of stuff around the house
• Journaling

What am I currently doing in my work that I like?

• Dragon University classes
• Mentoring / feedback with others
• Coaching Lauren

What am I currently doing in my life that I don't like

• Being tired / taking naps
• Scrolling Facebook so much
• 
  Not intentionally / deliberately focusing on kids
• Not working out
• Complaining 
• Swearing

What am I currently doing in my work that I don't like?

• Being unproductive
• Not seeking out work
• Gossiping / Rumor mill
• Complaining

Mindfulness Check-In  

During the 2-minute mindfulness check-in it was easy to focus on the negative stressors in my life such as moving and finding a new house, worrying about my kids in school and health concerns amidst COVID pandemic.  Through this exercise, I realize I do not want to think about being negative or constantly worrying.  

The main areas of my body that I carry tension and stress are my neck, back and shoulders.  The past few weeks my back and neck have been hurting, but yesterday was the worst.  My back was spasming so bad that I could hardly move.  I had to schedule a massage and even after 20 minutes the therapist was not able to fully relax my muscles.  I need to prioritize my health and self-care.  I scheduled another a full massage for Thursday but making these a normal part of my routine care is necessary.  On the flip side, I took time this weekend to paint my nails (which I hardly ever do).  This made me happy especially since several people at work complimented me on the color.  

When focusing on my spirit, the images that came to mind were my son, Hayden, writing his stories.  He has such a vivid imagination and is extremely creative.  I need to encourage him more, letting him know I'm proud and supportive.  My kids inspire me to take time to enjoy the small things in life.  They also inspire me to finish my commitments, stay creative and to continue writing.  

Seeking Balance  

Attending Mindfully to All Aspects of My Self

Body - Eat healthy, stretching daily, routine massage/chiropractor appointments, workout, yoga

Spirit - Read, meditate, go to church

Mind - Journaling, reading, learning

Emotion - Time with kids, gardening, mentoring

Mindfulness Change  

Fine-Tuning Beliefs and Behavior

I need to focus on my body and physical health by eating healthy and exercising regularly.  Self care has not been a priority but obviously needs to be.  I will challenge myself to exercise at least two times a week.  Eating healthy while travelling and moving will be difficult - I need plan ahead and choose healthy options when dining out and to-go.   I also need to connect with family more often.  When I first joined the Air Force I would spend Sunday's calling family and writing letters.  I would like to get back to doing that and include the kids; this would help emotionally.  Along with exercising regularly, I intend to practice mindfulness daily.  Specifically, I am setting my morning alarm for 15 minutes earlier to do yoga, journaling or mediation.  Lastly, I will engage in activities that I enjoy without guilt or shame.  

I was not surprised by any of my responses or answers.  On the contrary, I know and have known where I am lacking in regards to being mindful.  However, these exercises continue to remind me to re-align my actions and intentions. "Active participation in the world rather than detached observation" (Denning, p. 271). Action is critical to success and leadership. I must be intentional in my efforts and continuously create goals and milestones.

References:

Denning, S. (2011). The leader’s guide to storytelling: Mastering the art and discipline of business narrative. San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass.